Getting rejected can be hard. It can make you sad, hurt, surprised, or angry. In general, getting rejected rarely feels good. We spoke with Suzi Novak, Tibor Simon-Mazula and Stephanie Hansen about rejection. So, what are their experience and tips on how to deal with rejection? Let’s hop to it.
A save space ‘I recently realized I don’t as yet consider myself an artist. I am self-taught and sell art via Instagram, but as far as placing myself in a position of potential rejection such as an exhibition, I am yet to do that. My art started as a way of expressing what I was feeling and has grown from there. To possibly be rejected for exposing myself so personally is something I am working towards, as odd as that sounds. For now, I consider Instagram to be a safe space to show my work and allow for free creative expression.’ Says Suzi Novak.
Dealing with refusals ‘Even now I’m learning how to deal with refusals. I still take them emotionally, which in my opinion is not the right attitude to have as an artist.’ Says Tibor
Rejections are based upon judgments, and anyone who ever created something new knows, that opinions are varied, even though they come from professionals of the craft. So, Tibor usually reminds himself what’s good and bad (especially in art) is obscure. He tries to be conscious and understand that “not good” only means, that something is not in the right place. However, other times he sees rejection as if it would be a kind of control or a critique which could help me to go onward.
“What’s wrong with me?” ‘Oftentimes I have found myself saying these words after experiencing rejection, whether from relationships, careers, or creative endeavors.’ Says Stephanie
She know she is not alone in this. ‘I believe it’s human nature to put blame and find fault in ourselves when faced with failure or rejection.’ Over time, she learned to flip that blame into something positive, productive, and motivating. In assessing where she can improve, rather than letting the rejection deter her from doing something I love, it becomes about growth.
It took some time. Getting there took time. As rejections accumulated, ‘I realized giving up was not an option. I simply refused to see the path as ending. In order to deal with rejection, I had to become introspective, asking myself questions, turning self-doubt into an opportunity to better myself and my aspirations. I have to embrace, analyze, and learn from each failure, allowing each disappointment to push and pull my next application, attempt, or work in different directions.’ Says Stephanie
Confront rejection. Rejection can be devastating—it can break you if you let it. Thinking “what’s wrong with me” is a heavy chain that slows you down. It is a hard chain to break, but you can only change it by confronting rejection head on.
Most importantly, never give up. I keep trying, push myself and apply again or just learn from it. The latter is like when a film director sits in the audience and during his or her own film screening watches the viewer’s reactions.’ Says Tibor
Last, some tips of SHC Team
1) Acknowlege your emotions
Rather than supress, ignore or deny the pain, please acknowlegde your emotions. Admit when you feel embarrassed, sad, disappointed or discouraged. Try to keep confident while dealing with uncomfortable emotions head-on.
2) Review Rejection as evidence
Rejection is a proof that you are living life to the fullest. Rejection is part of life. You can expect to be rejected sometimes. Do not be afraid to go for it, even it may be a long shot.
3) Threat yourself with compassion
STOP SAYING: ‘You are so stupid for thinking you could do that’. Threat yourself with compassion. Respond to negative self-talk with a kinder, more affirming message.